Thursday, February 26, 2015

I'm not sure I agree with VVG

The way to know life is to love many things ~ Van Gogh

I'm not sure I agree with this sentiment. I don't think love makes the world go around. Call me crazy, but I think it takes a whole lot more than love to know life. 

Yes, I do have romance in my books, but my books have "romance surprise" as in: what the hell is he doing interested in me and do I want that at this point in my life? Because we have a choice about whether to love or not. And sometimes my heroes and heroines are poised on the brink of "okay maybe not." 

I think the way to know life is to live life. So many people, though, seem to think that they'll live life at some point in the future. For example, I have a friend who is a procrastinator. "Once I get X done, I'll get to remodeling that room" and "When garden season is over..." 

She lives in a charming little house that is full of junk that she just can't quite find time to organize. The stress around her is almost palpable. Every day the stacks grow higher and every day she says "I wish I could..." 

She isn't living her life. She's existing in it and not really enjoying it. Her days are full of worry and stress. I've given up volunteering to help, or mentioning ways to organize or really offering at all. She doesn't want the solution, which is to go through what she has and make the decision about what to throw out. She can't face that. I don't understand it that way of thinking so after listening to this for 8 years, now I just keep my mouth shut. 

As another friend used to say: Some people don't really want a solution; they just want to talk about the problem. 

I think the way to know life is to embrace it and live it. There are good and bad spots, and embrace them all. It's all part of who we are. You don't have to love many things. Love a few select people or things with energy and acceptance. The rest will fall into place. 

Remember: This is life. It's not a rehearsal. 

J L Wilson
Mystery with a touch of romance
Romance with a touch of gray


Margo Hoornstra said...

Bottom line would seem to be to each his/her own, JL. That's what makes life interesting. Love your life is not a rehearsal tome.

Diane Burton said...

I read an article about de-cluttering by a professional organizer. She explained why she won't take on a hoarder's house. Hoarders need professional counseling. While I "love" many things, I love people more but in different ways. I don't love my aunts the way I love my grandchildren. I think it's a matter of prospective. But someone who doesn't love anything must lead a very sad life.

Jannine Gallant said...

I think it's easy to get stuck in our routines and not burst out to "live" life--if we're talking about experiencing new things. My husband is a good example of someone who "lives" life. We're in a huge drought with horrible ski conditions in Tahoe. He said, "Screw it!" and took a week off work to go to Jacksonhole, WY to ski with a friend. Me, I tend to worry over money and not jump in with both feet. The point is, we'll survive his impromptu vacation just fine. We always do. One of these days I'm going to embrace that attitude. Or try to!