Barbara Edwards at Mt. St. Helens |
Everyone is posting about their plans for the new year. I had plans myself. I was so organized. I listed the titles I plan to finish, the blogs I will be posting on so I can do the writing early instead of the last minute and promised I would write daily.
Well.
Guess where that all went?
The only one I’ve been consistent on is the daily writing. Not the numbers I wanted, but at least I’m keeping up with my blogs. I am working on one of my novels.
I find I am grieving and the sorrow is exhausting. My daughter-in-law Linda would tell me to power through the pain like she had to do as a ballet dancer, then professional dancer. I can only try. I picture her lining up the angels for Jazzercise class then Yoga.
So.
I made my list to work on.
Two paranormals for my Rhodes End series: Jacob’s story, Wolf’s Promise.
A romantic contemporary: War is Heck
Another romance: Broken Dreams.
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I also got Scrivener for Dummies so I can use the Scrivener program more efficiently. I found that I like it but forget the details on using the parts.
For my own happiness, I need to write.
A new year is just that, new.
Grief and pain do pass. Life brightens and the one we lost is remembered with joy.
Linda didn’t read my novels, she said picturing me writing sex scenes made her nervous. I laughed and told her to read my Christmas shorts.
Since she loved dogs, she is in heaven with the my dog Dixie from Dixie’s Gift.
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Website http://barbaraedwards.net
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13 comments:
My sympathies to your family and to you for the loss of a daughter of the heart. I have one I dearly adore. Mourning takes time and we all do it at our own speed in our own way. Your writing will help. (((HUGS)))
The truism "life goes on" is just that, true. We have to get back to the business of living after a loss, but it's never easy. My best to you and your family, Barb. I hope your writing helps you through this new year.
Way to go, Barb! What if we didn't have our writing? I look around at friends my age and wonder how they cope without writing. When grief takes us to our knees, we create worlds we have control over. My condolences to you and your family on Linda's passing.
Adding my deepest condolences, Barbara. I too have a "daughter of the heart," or will when my son marries her in July. It's a special and unique relationship. Like Vonnie said, it takes time. Focusing on your writing sounds healthy and smart. I think what Rolynn said about creating our worlds makes so much sense and will hopefully help process all the hurt. Hugs from me as well.
Thank you, Vonnie.
Thank you, Jannine.
Thanks, Rolynn.
Thank you, Leah.
Every word of support and encouragement helps. This was so unexpected we are all in shock.Linda was in good health, had lost forty pound over several years and was an exercise instructor. She was a caring person and loved my son, a blessing he treasured.
Barb, I'm so sorry for your loss. Do look ahead to the coming year and get on with your life -- I'm sure your daughter-in-law wouldn't want it any other way.
I can truly feel for your loss of your daughter of the heart (love this expression and now know it fits mine). We almost loss ours and I shiver every time I think of those hours. Keep writing and let time take its course.
My deepest sympathy, Barbara. I don't have a daughter-in-law, but I know how close you can become to them. Let yourself grieve, and dive into your writing. You're on the right track. :) Hugs...
Adding my condolences to the others. As the Hospice counselor told me after I lost the 3rd "Mom" in 18 months, take time to grieve. Nobody can help you "get over" it. We all process loss differently. Do what's best for you. If writing helps, do it. But don't force yourself to do what you think you should. My losses were not unexpected--Mom had Alzheimer's, MIL was 102, her sister (my 3rd "Mom") was 100. Even so, I felt battered by loss. When losing a loved one unexpectedly, it's devastating. Sending more hugs.
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