Agent Lady swiftly jumped onto Plan B. In fact she had the story emailed to our list of previously agreed upon publishers before I had a chance to say, "Maybe I better work on it some more." She claimed she moved so swiftly because she knew I would do exactly that.But rejection brings changes, not just by switching to plan B, but also to the way we perceive our accomplishments and abilities. Self-doubt comes knocking at our doors. This time the pointy-headed sprite brought along a three-piece set of luggage when she rang our doorbell. I should have kicked her to the curb...but I didn't.
As a result I've been asking a question many authors ask themselves from time-to-time: Why am I writing?
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I've worked through the Pity Party for One. Moved onto step-two and questioned my writing abilities, all the while repeating the question. Why am I writing? Do I do it for the money? No. Do I do it to make a name for myself? Well, being known as a good writer would be nice. That's why I enter contests and pay close attention to my reviews. Perhaps I write to please my readers, then? To a degree, yes. Or, do I write to fulfil a deeper need?
I've worked through the Pity Party for One. Moved onto step-two and questioned my writing abilities, all the while repeating the question. Why am I writing? Do I do it for the money? No. Do I do it to make a name for myself? Well, being known as a good writer would be nice. That's why I enter contests and pay close attention to my reviews. Perhaps I write to please my readers, then? To a degree, yes. Or, do I write to fulfil a deeper need?
Then again, perhaps I'm asking the wrong question. Perhaps the question needs to be how would I survive if I didn't write?
Frankly I think my soul would dry-up. My brain would sour with a type of madness. And my heart would turn brittle and break. Simply put, I need to write. And I need to do it for me. This is my priority. Before I can comprehend all the possibilities, I must embrace my own priorities, my dreams. I leave you with a quote by the poet, Langston Hughes: "Hold fast to dreams. For if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly."
What are your priorities?
Vonnie Davis writes most sub-genres of romance. Her characters reveal themselves to her and demand to be heard. Visit Vonnie at www.vonniedavis.com .
6 comments:
You, Vonnie, are a writer. A writer writes because she can't NOT write. And, you're a damn fine writer. I'm sorry Carina passed, but never doubt your abilities. Just keep doing what you do so well.
It's true. You are a wonderful writer. So sorry about your disappointment. That just means something else is meant to be. Maybe something even better.
Thanks Jannine. To quote Calvin, "After all the homeruns you've had, don't stress over striking out." I licked my wounds for a day and then jumped back into the publishing fray.
Thanks, Margo. We all put so much of ourselves into our stories. To have it rejected hits on a very personal level--at least it does with me.
Well, rats. However, I have a couple of friends who have written for Carina, and they were very disappointed with the experience, so you may not have missed out on much. I've been rejected dozens of times by dozens of editors and agents over the years, so I probably should be immune to the disappointment and self-doubt by now, but I'm not. I know EXACTLY how you're feeling. My advice - always have a Plan B, and C, and D. So many readers love your work; they can't be wrong.
Thanks, Alison. Rejection doesn't get easier. We can philosophize about it all we want, but the sting remains.
Meanwhile, I love your new car!!! Serious envy here.
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