FIVE THINGS I KNOW ABOUT BEING A MOTHER by Andrea Downing

Cristal and I cooking together

It’s Mother’s Day and time to take stock of why I’m being treated to dinner with the rest of my colleagues.  I’ve given this much consideration; after all, I’ve had thirty-two years (my daughter’s age, not mine) to mull this over.  Of course, one would think that thirty-two years of experience would teach you a lesson. Not quite so…or at least, if we don’t generalize, not always true!  Here are five things I’ve learned about being a mother:

1) My daughter is the most beautiful, intelligent, wonderful, kind, considerate blah bla bla person in the world. You may think the same about your child, and know that the occasional snarky words, hissy fits, and tears are not his/her true self. This assessment cannot be denied or downgraded, and will be believed and taken with you to the grave.

2) My daughter knows far more than I could ever hope to know, even though I have a good thirty-five year head start on her:  my experience counts for nought.  Don’t think about asking stupid questions; you will only be talked down and have to find another, quiet, moment to ask the same question in a reasonable way.  Please take note, and mark it well:  You will never, ever, EVER be as smart as your children.

Cristal and her fiance, Daniel Saffon

3) Her boyfriend or his girlfriend is the second most wonderful person in the world, no matter what you think.  Luckily, my daughter Cristal is now engaged, and, yes, her fiancé is the second most wonderful person in the world—after all, he can put up with her.  OOooops, did I say that? Well, he must be Superman because he’s marrying Wonder Woman.  I do recall, however, a beau she dated for four years at university whom I absolutely could not stand. This was a major problem except that, happily, she was at university in the USA, and I lived in London at the time. When I received the call one afternoon that she had broken up with said boyfriend (for the very same reasons I disliked him), I practically pirouetted down the street in joy…

4) Every gift she/he gives you is in the best taste and exactly what you wanted. Do not even begin to think about this; don’t ask any questions, just wear or display whatever it is he/she’s given you and enjoy it, show it off, and be proud.  And that includes the item you wouldn’t be caught dead in.

5) Finally, when he/she presents you with your first grandchild and you foresee years ahead of babysitting, nose-wiping and diaper changing, listen carefully to the instructions she now gives you about holding that precious bundle.  After all, what the hell do you know about holding a baby?  Admittedly, I still have to look forward to this moment, yet I see it clear as day—the information, the instructions, the sigh of disapproval. 

Just as if I hadn’t raised the mother myself.

To read a bit more about the troubles children have with their parents, head to Bad Boy, Big Heart in the Come Love a Cowboy anthology, available at:  myBook.to/Come-Love-A-Cowboy 

AND  https://www.amazon.com/Come-Love-Cowboy-Kathleen-Ball-ebook/dp/B01D5876UK/

When New Yorker K.C. Daniels heads to Wyoming for a summer job, she wants nothing more than to fit in with the staff of the Lazy S Ranch. Yearning to be independent of her mom and dad, and have a taste of the west before she starts her Master's degree, getting involved with a cowboy is the last thing on her mind—especially when she’s greeted with warnings about ‘Bad Boy’ Chay Ridgway.

High school dropout Chay Ridgway sees summer as his time to be a rodeo star and win a girl in his life, while facing the responsibilities he has for his father. Although working to bring in cash to help his dad, he's never had a problem finding a woman who's happy to be that summer love—until K.C. Daniels appears on the scene.

As two different worlds collide in a season that will end all too soon, is this going to be another summer romance or a love that will last for years?

And find me at:

Website & Blog:  http://andreadowning.com

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/writerAndreaDowning

Twitter:  @andidowning  https://twitter.com/AndiDowning

Goodreads:  http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6446229.Andrea_Downing

Amazon Author Page:  http://www.amazon.com/Andrea-Downing/e/B008MQ0NXS/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Things I've Learned Along the Way

Today is my sixty-fifth birthday. How can this be when I'm so young? Or so I keep asking myself. Calvin, on the other hand, just smirks and says, "It's been a long time coming, angel." Yeah, like sixty-five years! Golly, just saying it makes my eyeballs twitch. I retired when we married ten years ago, so this birthday milestone does not carry with it the typical yay me, I get to retire hoopla. Although I am a proud carrier of a Medicare card. And when I announced to my doctor during my visit last week that he was getting my virgin Medicare card, the young man blushed. "I just love you and Calvin. I'm telling you, I've got no patients like the two of you."

That was a compliment. Right?

So what have I learned along the way to this milestone? I've learned to love more and judge less. I've learned to embrace the future and cherish the past. I've learned the smartest people are little children. They see the wonders of the world through eyes filled with possibilities instead of boxing things in with jaded expectations. Take a dandelion, for example. A child looks upon it as a thing of beauty and magic. Blow on it and watch what happens. Adults look at the same flower and think weeds.

 

Most importantly I've learned the value of dreams. The ultimate fulfillment one experiences when he or she completes every step toward the attainment of that dream or goal. For me, it was writing and being published. For others, it is getting a college degree or playing professional sports or mastering a musical instrument or dance. All require sacrifice and hard work. All strengthen our souls and enrich our lives.

 

One of my favorite poets is Langston Hughes. I'd like to share his poem regarding dreams:

 

Dreams by Langston Hughes

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.      

Wanna Hold My Frog?

I get a kick out of character interviews. I love getting to know more about heroes and heroines. What they like. What makes them tick. I enjoy a character with attitude or a secret or charm oozing from his or her pores. Take Sawyer Masterson, for example. He's going to talk to us today.

Me: Hi Sawyer.

S.M: Hi Miz Vonnie. Here, wanna hold my frog? His...his name is Scream. He gets lost in the house or the car and then eberbody screams.

Me: Ewwl! No...ah... no, honey, I don't want to hold him.

S.M: It's okay, Miz Vonnie. He don't bite. Unkie Storm says frogs don't got teeff.

Me: Tell me about your Uncle Storm, Sawyer. Do you do stuff with him?

S.M.: Oh, yeah. I go widing wif him lots. And I take my af'ta'noon nap in his big bed. He...he let me nap dere after Mommy got sick with cancer. I was sad 'cause Mommy was too sick to play wif me. Unkie Storm, he let me sleep dere and he weed me stories and showed me how to tie knots in rope. Do you like books, Miz Vonnie?

Me: Well, yes. Yes I do. What kind of books do you like?

S.M: Well, I got all the Courious George Books and Doctor Seuss books too, but...but you know what? He's not really a doctor 'cause he don't take care'a sick people.

Me: (Laughing) He doesn't?

S.M: (Shakes his head) Nope. My mommy don't go to him and she's sick. Her...her got loo-keem-ya.

Me: Do you have a favorite super hero?

S.M: (His eyes light up.) Yeah! Superman. Wachel, she's my mommy's nurse, made me a superman cape with a BIG "S" on the back for Superman Sawyer. I wund through the house with it on and "save the day."

Me: Oh, I bet you do.

S.M: Do you think I'm smart, Miz Vonnie? My mommy says I'm the smartest boy in the whole wide world and pro'bly the smartest boy in Texas, too. Miz Noella says I smart 'cause I drink all my milk when I get done eatin'. (Rubs his stomach) All dat milk fills in the cracks dat the food makes.

Me: (totally charmed) Oh, I see.

S.M: Miz Vonnie. Are you gonna scream? 'Cause I don't know where my frog went...

Excerpt:

“Unkie Storm! I’m all clean fwom my baf.” Sawyer streaked onto the patio wearing Sponge Bob pajamas, a book in his grasp and his hair still wet from his bath. Storm held out his arms for his nephew, who shot into them. He loved the feel of this child in his arms.

If Pilar had her way, Sawyer might be the closest he came to being a father. Although she promised, insisted even, she’d help raise the boy if something happened to Sunny, Pilar made it quite clear getting “big with child” and “changing disgusting diapers” was not in her future.

“Mommy got me a new Georgie book.” Sawyer wiggled and grunted and settled into Storm’s lap. He held the book in front of Storm’s face, waving it back and forth. “Will you wead it to me?”

“I didn’t hear the magic word.” Storm gave the child a stern look.

“Oops. Sowwy. Will you please wead it to me?”

Sunny lowered herself into a chair next to Jackson. “Does Unkie Storm have a choice?” She laughed softly.

Jackson reached out and took her hand, bringing it to his mouth for a kiss. “You always were beautiful in the moonlight.”

Sunny’s eyes opened wide. “Well, aren’t you just full of compliments tonight.”

Jackson winked. “Darlin’, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”

“Okay, grown-ups. Time to be quiet while I read Curious George Goes to the Beach.”

Sawyer laid his head against Storm’s chest. “I wuv you, Unkie Storm.”

Storm kissed the child’s dark hair, inhaling the smell of the child’s shampoo and savoring that sense of contentment he always felt when holding this little fellow. “I love you, too, son.”

Great Outdoors Month by Jena Galifany

June has been designated Great Outdoors Month. It is the time to get out in the open as much as possible and enjoy the world around you. I live in the high desert so being outside in the daytime can be hazardous to my health. Temperatures can reach from high nineties to the low hundreds. It is better to get the outdoor time in after the sun goes down.

Doug and Steve @ Knotts 2011

What can be done after the sun goes down that’s fun for the kids? Did you ever play hide and seek? It’s a simple childhood game where one person is “It”. That person would cover their eyes and count to twenty while the others all hide. Then the It person has to find them. If they are found but can make it to the counting spot, aka “home” before It tags them, they are free. If It is looking for someone else, the others can try to run for “home” and be free. Simple, right?

Now, our version of the game is this: Everyone wears black clothing that they don’t care if they get wet in and a sturdy pair of old sneakers. Each player is armed with a super-soaker and a squirt gun. Have a centrally located plastic kitchen sized garbage can filled with water. Floating in that water is a large stockpile of water balloons ready for use. If an attack is going on a balloon can be scooped from the container as you run by. These are ammo for every one to use.

The game is now played along these lines. No lights should be on in the yard so hiding can be creative. Be sure that there is nothing that can be a hazard in the dark yard. You don’t want anyone to fall during the game. Everyone hides. I’ve hidden by lying down in the shadow of a fence. I suggest checking for ants before trying this. My husband has spent time sniping from up in a tree. My youngest took a pail of water balloons up into her tree house and clobbered anyone who tried to sneak by below her. She was only five when she did this.

Now, everyone is It and everyone is fair game. The players may take up a hiding place to snipe from or if they are more adventurous, they can go out hunting the others. It’s all good fun and cooling in the summer heat. I have two and a half acres so our games got to be rather large.

 For her sixteenth birthday, my older daughter wanted a game of water wars, our name for the game. She wanted to have a couple of her friends on her team and she wanted to “hunt” boys. My son, my nephew, and my husband were the branded targets for the night. The girls had a blast keeping the guys on the run.

One should note that after the game has ended, be sure to let all the targets know. After the girls had their fill of hunting, they came in to watch a movie and eat popcorn. After a while, I noticed that my husband was missing. I went out to the yard and found him. He’d been sitting up in a tree, getting eaten by bugs, waiting for the girls to sneak by. No one told him that they were coming in for the night. Now, there’s dedication to fun in the out doors!

Jen in meditation @ Knotts 2011

All of this fun can take place once the sun goes down, after a barbeque or a day spent back-packing or taking a nature walk at a local park. The important thing is to get outside and enjoy the health benefits of fresh air and exercise.

What are your favorite out door games? Did you ever have a Badminton set or a croquet set out in your yard? We did when I was a kid. We also had a large tent set up in the back yard all the time. I spend a lot of time in that tent. My siblings and I were always out side and we had a great time. How about you?

Cheers!

 _____________________________
Jena Galifany writes in the genre of sweet romance and adventure. She can be found at her WEBSITE, or on Facebook.

Things My Mother Taught Me...

By Glenys O'Connell ( @GlenysOConnell )

Even though we deal in dreams and fantasy, every now and again Real Life intrudes even on the lives of fiction writers. I've just been through such a patch, tossed around by a mischievous Universe, to land gasping on the shore of what I hope will be a wee bit of peace and quiet. Time to write again, please!

The result is that I've missed several of my Roses of Prose blog dates. Gee, guys, I hope you missed me….

Anyway, this means that I'm chasing my tail to catch up and so this blog post is quick and simple, inspired by the words of a friend who once told me: "Suddenly, out of the blue, I found myself talking (or yelling) at my kids in my mother's voice. OMG, it was very scary." Well, yes, been there, done that.

Mother's Day was one of the themes for this month and I'm happy - and relieved - to say my kids remembered it with flowers, cards and chocolate. Yes, they know my weaknesses well.

And then in church, the minister handed out these words of explanation which I'm going to share with you now. I'm afraid I don’t know who write them, but whoever you are, you are a very wise soul. So, here goes:

WHAT MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME:

My mother taught me RELIGION: When I spilled grape juice on the carpet, she instructed: "You better pray the stain comes out."

My mother taught me LOGIC:  From her decisive words: "Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT: "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.

My mother taught me IRONY: "Keep laughing, and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about STAMINA: "You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER: "It looks like a tornado swept through your room."

And last, but by no means least:

My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE: "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out…"

Yep, sometimes I've heard my Mother's voice when I've been talking to my kids. Fortunately, they never did listen to me, so no harm done.  Right?

So here's a belated Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there - may you speak in your own voice, but with the wisdom of all your fore-mothers.

Glenys O'Connell has survived the growing up of all four of her children, plus countless pets of all varieties. She thinks she's still speaking in her own voice, except when she gets too involved with her imaginary friends, er, characters. Her latest book, Naked Writing:The No Frills Way to Write Your Book, is now available in print on Amazon, here