Friday, September 22, 2017

IQ "Schmei-Q" by Leah St. James

I think most of us have seen those online quizzes that start off with something like: “Only 5 percent of the population can get a perfect score on this test.” And then when you do get a perfect score, the screen flashes a message that you’re a genius.

I’m pretty gullible, but I’m not gullible enough to think that having a basic knowledge of, for example U.S history, makes me a “genius.” But I’m not averse to having some online quiz creator think I am! :-)



Yes, I aced it! :-)

A few weeks ago, however,  I clicked on a link for an online IQ test–the real thing. The first couple were easy find-the-number-pattern type of questions, so easy, in fact, that I convinced myself I must certainly be a certified genius by that test’s standards. Then the questions got a little harder, and I had to think about the answers. The majority were math based, or maybe engineering based. Actually, I’m not sure what discipline they fell into, but I do know there were only a few that dealt with words and vocabulary (my strength). I should have known then I was doomed.

Halfway through the assessment, the difficulty quotient jumped even higher, and I had to skip a few. Then my sister called and I blabbed to her for about 20 minutes. By the time I got back to the test, I was selecting answers by the eenie-meenie-minie-mo method and wondering what kind of sadistic jerk could have devised such a torturous series of “brain teases” for his or her fellow humans?! 

A really smart person would have skipped checking the score, but I did, which confirmed that I am, in fact, not a genius. In fact, my score was so low, it’s a wonder I can function at all.

After that, I moped around for a few days, convinced that I’d passed on sub-standard intelligence genes to my two sons, and agonizing for the future of my family’s blood line. I’m over it now (sort of), after reading that the test was timed, so taking longer than x-number of minutes would lower the score, but for some reason, I want another shot at it. Why? Why am I torturing myself?

I haven’t figured out that answer, but I did a little research into these online IQ tests found what I think might be the ultimate site for mind-gaming:  American Mensa’s Virtual Game Room.

Despite some easy sounding names, my first inclination was to X-out of the potential disaster. But then that inner demon took hold, and away I clicked.  I selected something called “Pat Sajak’s Lucky Letters,” which is similar to the Wheel of Fortune TV show.

I was nervous but told myself this game was more up my alley – it had letters, words and phrases, the stock of my trade! And once I got the hang of how it was played, I started to score fairly well. I even wagered my entire winnings on one of the Lucky Draw rounds. For me, that’s huge. I don’t make bets. Ever. But I looked at the clue, looked at the possible answers, and it was a no brainer!

A few minutes later, I was in the lightning round, starting to sweat and wondering when I’d turned into this creature who wanted to spin the dial. Would I bomb, like that offensive, so-called IQ test, or would my love of letters and words come through for me?

And joy of joys, I won! I won I won I won I won I won!

But am I going back for round two? Heck, no. I’m done. I’ll quit while I’m ahead, forever a winner of Pat Sajak’s Lucky Letters on none other than mensa.org. I may never take another IQ test again.
 

What about you? Do you torture yourself with online quizzes or IQ tests?

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Leah writes stories of mystery and suspense, good and evil and the enduring power of love. She blogs here on the 6th and 22nd of each month and hangs out online most often at Facebook. She loves visitors! To learn more about her writing, visit her website at www.leahstjames.com.

15 comments:

Diane Garner said...

Ha! Love your writing style. I don't think I've ever done an IQ test but I am a sucker for the history, current events, geography, and Sound of Music types.

Leah St. James said...

Thanks, Diane. :-) I don't know why I let myself get suckered in. I am the most un-competitive person I know, except apparently with myself!

Alison Henderson said...

Haha! You must be a glutton for punishment, Leah. Actually, I have to confess I took one of those IQ tests, too--largely out of curiosity because, as far as I know, I had never taken any IQ test before. The results were exactly what I would have predicted--comfortably above average but no genius. My favorite online quizzes are the personality predictors. There is no end to humans' fascination with ourselves.

Jannine Gallant said...

Those online quizzes (where everyone is a genius) make me roll my eyes. I test them by answering what I think is correct, and they tell me I'm a genius. Then I do it again and choose all what I believe to be wrong answers. What do you know...I'm still a genius! LOL I've done a couple of the real IQ tests online. Those suckers are hard and generally require a lot of math/geometry skills, spacial recognition, and only a few word challenges. I do pretty well on them, so there's hope I didn't pass inferior genes to my kids. LOL

Rolynn Anderson said...

I'm generally lousy at multiple guess tests and prefer to label that skill as a kind of intelligence in itself. I may not have that one...but I have others, dang it! As an educator, I have seen a plethora of measurement devices come and go...delineations and labels by the wagons full. To categorize is a human endeavor, but a heavy focus on grouping/grading/making hierarchies, may waste time, money and do more harm than good. When I see a test coming, I walk the other way.

Leah St. James said...

That must be it, Alison...some quest to know more about myself! I never thought of it, but it makes sense!

Leah St. James said...

I've been tempted to do the same, Jannine. Too funny! I'm in awe of people who do well on those spacial recognition tests. I get completely turned around in my head!

Leah St. James said...

I have others, too, Rolynn!! I agree they are a waste of time, and I need to learn to walk away.

Margo Hoornstra said...

Hmmmm. Have to say I never have taken a test like that. I'll have to look one up someday. Go you though for sticking with it and coming out a winner. Guess that means you were a winner going in, huh?

Leah St. James said...

Ha! I like the way you think, Margo. :-)

Brenda Whiteside said...

Funny post, Leah. I don't take them. I'm not even tempted. In fact, I've never even played an on-line game. I can remain blissfully unaware of my abilities in that area!

Leah St. James said...

You're obviously wiser than I am, Brenda! :-)

Alicia Dean said...

:) Your post made me laugh. I am not tempted to take those IQ tests. They really just sound like work. And...like I could be, I don't know...WRITING instead of taking them. Ahem... :D Congrats on your win!

Leah St. James said...

Writing, huh, Alicia? Hmmm...what a concept! :-) You also are far wiser than I!

Diane Burton said...

I've never taken the IQ tests, but I love the ones that ask if you can name the book or movie from one line or picture. Trivial Pursuit is one of my fav games. (It's pretty bad, though, when our 7 y.o. grandson knows the answers on Star Wars better than the adults. I'm shamed. LOL I like challenging my knowledge. I guess that's why I'm a sucker for those trivia games.