Sex and Coffee at Bob Evans

~ by Vonnie Davis

Bob Evans, a restaurant chain that serves breakfast all day, along with other fare, is one of our favorite places to eat. One reason is their free Wi-Fi. Another is the coffee. And, of course, the service and food is always excellent. We go two or three times a week, arriving around ten in the morning and staying until three. I write. Calvin reads our morning newspaper and his iPad.

On our way there, he'll often ask me what I plan on writing and we'll discuss it. So when I told Calvin today was sex scene writing day, he kissed my hand and told me I'd get through it just like I had with every other one I'd written.

Calvin knows how I dislike penning sex scenes. How I've balked at past editors demanding more sex, earlier in the book and with explicit language. Honestly, if I could get away with writing sex in a humorous way, I would.

Yesterday, the greeter took us to our booth and chatted for a few minutes. We're known by name there, after all. Our waitress came by to say hello and did we want our usual coffees? Calvin responded with, "Yes, and please keep my wife's cup filled today. She's writing an up-against-the-wall sex scene."

I slid down on my side of the booth, trying to look as small as I felt.

The waitress, her face as red as Bob Evan's roof, opened and closed her mouth with only a squeak eking out before nodding and all but running away.

"Why would you tell her that?"

"What? That you're writing a sex scene? It's sex, angel, everyone does it." He shook his newspaper as if he'd just proclaimed something profound. The waitress appeared with our cups and Calvin looked at her. "Did I offend you with my remark earlier? I didn't mean to. After all, everyone has sex. Right?"

She waved her hand in front of her face. "Oh lawd, another hot flash!" She bustled off.

Word must have spread.

Every waitress, one of the cooks, AND the manager came by with a pot of coffee to top off my cup, each one standing behind my shoulder. I knew what they were doing. So in a "rare" display of cheekiness (oh dear, was that a bad pun?), I kept tapping away on my laptop, writing my sex scene as they nonchalantly read snippets of it. The manager tapped my shoulder and said Calvin and I could stay as long as we wanted. Uh-huh. Before I knew it, I had the dreaded scene written. In fact, I moved them onto the shower where they did the wild fandango again. By then I'd had so much coffee, I had the shakes.

I took an online workshop through RWA a couple years ago about writing sensual scenes. The presenter talked about setting the scene to write sex. How did we do it? Some participants wrote they donned sexy lingerie. Others lit candles and played sexy music. Some drank wine by candlelight, dressed in sexy things and listening to slow, sultry tunes. Me? I go to Bob Evans and drink coffee.

What's your method?

READ MORE ABOUT VONNIE DAVIS at www.vonniedavis.com

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Falling Between the Sheets

Writers are often great procrastinators. At least I can be. Take right now, for instance. I'm supposed to be writing the first sex scene of the book I'm frantically writing so I meet my deadline in three weeks. Instead I'm writing this blog five days early and, for a person who typically writes them the night before, this ought to give you an idea how much I dislike writing sex scenes.

I've written roughly twenty. You'd think it would get easier to have my characters fall between the sheets, if they even make it to the bed. But I want every act of intimacy to sound different, feel unusual for the reader.

Let me ask you, how many ways can one make the same act sound diverse?

It's kind of like eating a bagel, isn't it? We can eat them plain as we run out of the door. Spread them with cream cheese if we have a few extra minutes to add something special. Or use a variety of different toppings, if we want to enjoy a taste of something different. But in the end, we're going to open our mouths and take a bite--and enjoy.


Personally, I'd sooner toss my characters a plain bagel and yell, "Have a good day!" The next sound I'd hear would be my editor falling out of her chair. Editors want excitement, pizazz and lots of fillings on their sex bagel. This is where the emotions between the two people come into play. The experiences they've shared so far and how they feel about one another. I'd sooner dwell on this than the physicality of everything. Once again, editors don't always agree. Maybe I'll toss them the plain bagel...

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