A KEY TO HAPPINESS

So our theme this month is organizing. By this time you realize that I'm not much for organizing my house. My thought with this blog is to help with another type of organizing. Organizing one's well being. A key to happiness. I don't have a magic wand, but I believe one key is knowing what makes you happy. My husband. My children. My family. My doggies. Those are a given and an easy answer. But today I'm not taking about who or what you love that makes you happy. I want to talk about what you do to make yourself happy. 

So what makes me happy?

  

I'm happiest when I'm busy. I'm like my father that way. He always had a project or two underway when I was younger. My father was a high school teacher and basketball coach. He was also a workaholic. My siblings and I used to cringe if he didn't have a summer job because it meant one thing- we were going to be busy. And I mean busy. One summer my father thought we should get a feel for what real work was like. He had us hoe out a whole cotton patch. Yes, manually. Yes, he had a tractor that could have plowed it nicely. But we wouldn't have gained that experience in life. Experience he always contended was important.

Over time I have come to realize one thing. I have become my father. No, I have never made my children hoe out a cotton patch, but it wouldn't have hurt them if they had. No, I have come to understand my father better, because in a sense I have become him. I have to be busy. I don't need a lot of sleep. I can't stand it when I don't have control of a situation. And I have become a workaholic myself.

I'll admit it. I like to work. I like my job at the hospital. I love to write. If I had a little more time, I'm sure I would like to clean my house...but I have all these projects. I read what most authors recommend- to complete one project at a time when it comes to writing. I'm sure that would be a good idea. I have only one problem with that- I can't do it.

THE JUDAS KISS

I'm happy when I'm writing. I'm not even organized when I write. I'm a panster. I don't follow an outline. I go with the flow of the story. Oh, I know where I want to go. It's just the journey to that end - most of the time, I'm not exactly certain how I'm going to get there, but I have faith in my story. It comes. I have to feel the story. But that means I go and come to my writings. When I'm in the middle of writing, I become obsessed with the story or that portion of it. If I'm stuck at a point, I move on to what I am feeling.

Why am I telling you this? It explains why I have so much going on this year with my writing. Everything seems to be finished at one time. THE JUDAS KISS was just released. It's my first book in the Tide of Charleston series. I'm so excited about The Judas Kiss because the series is set in Charleston. I love the mystic of Charleston. I have two more releases with the Tides of Charleston, The Promise in May and Another Night Falls is September. Under my pen name, Carrie James Haynes, I'm continuing on with the Whispers of a Legend series releasing, Vision of Destiny, hopefully at the end of February. Then I have Daughter of Deceit (historical paranormal) set to be released at the end of January.   

So much to do...but I'm happy. So what about you? What do you do that makes you feel better?

Check out my new release, The Judas Kiss, a historical fiction book sweeping from Charleston Harbor to the ballrooms of London during the turmoil of the American Revolution. Also excited- Whispers of a Legend, PartOne-Shadows of the Past has gone FREE on Amazon! 

SHADOWS OF THE PAST

Can find me over on Novel Works, my historical blog, and 

Castles in the Air.

Make Time for What's Important by Alison Henderson

Even if you don’t believe in making resolutions, and setting goals feels like too much pressure, January is the perfect time to take stock of your life and look for ways to make the coming year more satisfying. All of us have interests, activities, and passions that give life spice—those things you do just for yourself. You might have the full support of your family and friends, or you might be nurturing your interest in secret—not yet ready to share it with the world. Whatever your situation, you’ll probably agree the main obstacle is finding time.

Personal time is one of the most valuable commodities in modern life. It takes commitment to carve out precious hours from already limited family and work time to devote to yourself. And then there’s the guilt… I don’t know about you, but guilt held me back for years from making time to pursue my passion.

As women, we are used to putting ourselves last, especially if we have families. They NEED us every waking second. Or do they? This is a critical question you have to answer for yourself. Under some circumstances and at certain stages of life, the answer may be “yes”, but it’s so easy to stretch that “yes” well beyond necessity.

I’m a writer, but I’m also a wife, mother, and full time executive. I’m all too aware of the trade-offs and conflicts of trying to “have it all”, but you can have more than you think. I turned a corner in the struggle when I picked up a copy of Time to Write: Professional writers reveal how to fit writing into your busy life, by Kelly L. Stone, at the RWA national conference a few years ago. This little book is a compilation of practical tips and strategies from dozens of successful writers on finding time.

The authors specifically address time to write, but the advice could apply to pursuing any interest or activity. First, you have to give yourself permission, and for many of us that’s the biggest hurdle. Once you’ve surmounted it, scrutinize your life and schedule for potential blocks of time, however small. Are you a morning or night person? Could you squeeze in time for yourself before your family wakes up or after they go to bed? Are there points in your day when you feel you’re wasting time?

For me, the biggest time-waster was television. My husband is a big TV watcher, and I felt obligated to watch with him in the evenings because I was away at work all day and he was home alone (he’s retired). There are very few programs I actively enjoy, but I sat with him to keep him company. I decided to limit my viewing to my favorites, no more than one hour a night, and devote the rest of the evening to writing. It wasn’t easy to set the guilt aside, but my husband survived and I finished that book in record time! Now, I can ease up on the schedule when I don’t have a pressing project, but it’s reassuring to know the time can be there when I want or need it—like having extra money in the bank.

In 2012, I encourage you to examine your life and be sure to make time for yourself in it!

Alison Henderson

www.alisonhenderson.com

Six Steps to a More Organized You

By Christine DePetrillo

  

January is a time for setting goals and keeping to them. Many people decide that getting more organized is a goal they’d like to try. Here are six steps that have kept me organized over the years. They might work for you too.

1. Only keep what you need – It is so easy to collect stuff you’ll never use. People give you gifts that you don’t want or aren’t your taste, and you shove them into a closet thinking maybe someday they’ll be of use. Guess what? They won’t. If your first instinct is “I’m never going to use this,” it’s probably true. You’d be better off giving the unwanted items away to charity or someone you know will use them than to litter your home with them. It may sound heartless, but clutter is the devil.
2. Have a chore schedule – In my house, I do certain chores on certain days. For example, Saturday is house cleaning day, Tuesday is laundry day, Wednesday is pet maintenance day, etc. You get the idea. This way I know I hit all the necessary chores, but don’t get stuck doing them all in the same day like some sort of modern-day Cinderella.
3. Delegate responsibilities – If you live with other folks, they ought to be doing some things to keep organized too. The duties should not fall on one person. A well-functioning team can transform a chaotic, messy house into a smooth-running, cozy home.
4. Make lists – I live by them and not because I can’t remember stuff. I’m not that old yet. I make lists because it helps me manage my time better. Something about seeing what I have to do written out on a piece of paper allows me to figure out how I’m going to get it all done in the time I have available. Plus, there’s the always fun activity of crossing things off the list once you’ve accomplished them.
5. Be prepared – Plan ahead for events and commitments. I know things come up that you weren’t expecting, but if you plan for the expected things, you’ll be less stressed. Keeping a calendar is a great way to make sure you know what’s happening and when. Looking ahead is always better than running to catch up.
6. If all of these don’t appeal to you, get a personal assistant. Perhaps one of the tall, dark, and handsome variety who doesn’t feel the need to cover his six-pack abs with a shirt. Get one that will cater to your every need and make keeping you organized his sole purpose in life. J

Happy Organizing!

Christine

ABRA CADAVER, The Wild Rose Press, available now

ALASKA HEART, The Wild Rose Press, available now

www.christinedepetrillo.weebly.com

Organizing your medical life

There are a lot of things -- medically speaking -- that we can't control. Sometimes people get dealt a bad hand, health-wise, and they just have to deal.

I've been remarkably healthy most of my life, but the last few years have been challenging. An old back injury has morphed into sciatica; I have mysterious hip and leg cramps that defy explanation; and I've had digestive issues most of my life but now they're troublesome.

The result of all this is that in 2010 I spent most of the year going from one specialist to another. I saw every 'ist' there was: neurologist, podiatrist, gastro-enterologist, gynecologist, dermatologist ... I saw spine doctors, stomach doctors. nerve doctors, foot doctors, bone doctors, all trying to figure out why I have such a messed-up pelvic region, because that's what it boils down to: all nerves in the body flow through the pelvic region and for some reason, my nerves are out of whack. I tried acupuncture, physical therapy, water therapy, chiropractic, holistic chiropractic ...

The end result? I still have cramps, but I think I have them under control by doing a series of stretches every day. I still have digestive issues, so I've bumped up my fiber intake. And I still have hip pain, and I use ice packs when it's bad and when it's really bad, I sleep in a chair.

How does this equate to getting organized? Here's how. I keep a detailed list of all of my medications (dosage and size), my doctors and their specialties (both here and in Minnesota), my exercise routine, and the chronic conditions that have plagued me. I keep it to one page, single spaced, bullet list. Whenever I hear "bring a list of your medications with you" I just print out a new copy.

This is SO useful -- I just hand them that sheet and the admitting nurse has everything he or she needs. It's especially useful since I moved to a new state and all of my records aren't centralized. When I started getting new doctors here, I just handed them "my" health history and away we went.

Like I said: there's a lot we can't control. But we can make life a little bit easier when we're going in for that procedure or exam or test.

I've Got a Bruise on my Forehead.

This is "get organized" month, and I dread every day of it. Organization is not my strong suit. Heck, it's not even my weak suit. With every lovely post on the fine art of organizing, I've gotten more and more depressed. I mean, isn't it bad enough Twinkies has gone into bankrupcy?

Everyday when I open our blog, I slap my forehead, and it's gotten so bad, my forehead is bruised.

"You should put something on that," Calvin suggested, his hand in the cookie jar.


When I opened the door to our medicine cabinet, two bottles of Nyquil hit me on the nose. Darn if I didn't have to clean the cabinet out just to find cotton balls to shove up my nose to stop the bleeding.

When dear Calvin saw my swollen nose, he said as he opened a bag of chips, "Maybe you should put ice on that."

Well, my ice bag is kept in the freezer. You know, just so I know where it's at. But when I opened the freezer, two half-gallons of ice cream fell on my feet and broke all my toes--or so it seemed. So I had to clean out and organize my freezer just to find the darn ice pack for my nose.

Altnough the ice took the swelling out of my nose, my toes were too swollen to squeeze into winter shoes, so I had to find a pair of sandals in my walk-in closet. I knelt and reached between stacks of plastic tubs full of summer clothing to find my favorite pair of strappy, comfy shoes. How was I to know that's where our neighbor's cat we're babysitting, while they're gone, takes his afternoon nap? Mr. Cuddles (NOT) scratched my arm to bits. So, I had to clean the darn closet and organize it just to find my sandals, flipflops, Dr. Schols...anything for my swollen tootsies.

Calvin saw me pouring peroxide on my arm. "You should probably wrap that," he suggested as he poured another cup of coffee. I shot him a dark look.

Problem was when I cleaned and organized the medicine cabinet, I put all the overflow into the linen closet. How...how was I to know Mr. Cuddles, still in a feline huff from having his hiding place disturbed, had laid claim to the linen closet?



I'm telling you I can't take any more organizing! I'm just not cut out for it. And if you think that picture is of me, let me say that dear helpful husband gave me one TOO many suggestions.

NEW YEAR RESOLUTION - DE-CLUTTER

THE PERILS OF NOT DE-CLUTTERING – Margaret Tanner

Happy New Year to everyone.

The start of a new year is a great time to de-clutter, figuratively and literally speaking. A time to cast off the old and start afresh with the new.

I am a clutter collector from way back. I figure why throw anything out; you never know when you might need it. I inherited the hoarder gene.

“Waste not, want not” was my mother’s motto and she lived by it the whole of her life. Maybe it was because she lived through the great depression of the 1930’s and World War 2, that she would use and re-use, save and squirrel away stuff. Our house was never untidy, because most of the hoarded items were well out of sight. 

 
I should have learned my lesson after my dear mother died about 20 years ago and my sister and I had to clear out her house. To say it was a nightmare was an understatement. It took weeks. My mother had kept receipts from the 1940’s, even her World War 2 ration book. And speaking of books, she had hundreds of them. Then there were the ornaments, pretty little knick-knacks that reposed on every shelf or level surface in the house. Boxes of china. Well, you get the idea.

Now you would think that after all this trauma and angst, I would have dashed home and gone through my own cupboards.  I didn’t, but I did take a lot of my mother’s stuff with me.  Well, how could I let it go?  All those little treasures.

My mother-in-law passed away, same story, I kept a lot of her things too. I was a hoarder.  It came as naturally as breathing or eating.

Well friends, retribution did come. The youngest of our sons finally left home, so hubby and I decided it was time to downsize. We bought a smaller house, and put our larger house on the market. “We’ve got a lot of stuff here, we’ll have to get rid of it,” hubby says.

Over my dead body. “No, we won’t do anything rash,” I said, “we’ll put it in storage, which we did, and it wasn’t easy, took us several weekends. So, my house was partially emptied and ready for the pre-sale inspections.

A week before the auction of our house, my husband had to have heart by-pass surgery, so I had to go on with the sale alone. After the auction and hubby’s successful operation, I had to start packing, because when he came home he couldn’t do anything for eight weeks. I really hit the panic button because we had a short settlement. 40 days to clear out all our stuff, that of my mother and mother-in-law (that I had kept, and shouldn’t have). Well, it was a nightmare. I did most of it on my own.  I don’t know how many trips I made to donate all these “treasures” to the second hand thrift shop (we call them Op shops here in Australia.  They are run by charities to raise money to help the less fortunate).  And I did help the less fortunate - big time.  The Op shop manager must have thought I was Mother Teresa re-incarnated.

It was terrible. I cried because I had to give away my ‘treasures, mum’s treasures and my mother in-law’s treasures’. Worse still, was the time it took to pack them and deliver them to the Op shop. 

With the clock ticking, I had to be ruthless – and I was.

If you are even contemplating moving house, start to get rid of your surplus stuff early.  In fact, don’t collect it in the first place.  A lady once told me that if she didn’t wear a dress for a year, she was probably never going to wear it again, and she got rid of it. Smart lady. Wish I had such courage.  I still cling to my favourite dresses, hey I might lose weight and they will fit me again???

The moral of this story is -  don’t hoard. De-clutter as much as possible, because one day you will have to sort it out, or your children will have to sort it out.  

The same goes for your writing.  If it isn’t working, discard it. Be ruthless. Start all over again if necessary, but never ever give up.

My website:  http://www.margarettanner.com/

I am multi-published with Whiskey Creek Press and the Wild Rose Press.

Two Pounds a Week, the Organized Way!



Laura Breck

 My main goal for 2012 is to lose weight. I'm guessing right about this time of the year, it's about half the population's goal, too. I've tried a lot of different diets, programs, regimens, hypnosises. But this year, I'm organizing a five-pronged attack.

Exercise, diet, motivation, reward, and support.

Exercise - self explanatory, but here's what I figured out. I have an exercise DVD that I just don't like. I'm going to sell it on E-bay and buy one I do like. Something like belly dancing, or hip hop, or maybe...would hubby let me put in a pole??? I'm much more likely to exercise if I enjoy it.

Diet - I have a sweet tooth. I've purchased mass quantities of gum, hard candy, and dried fruit. I'll use them in that order to curb the sugar monster. Fresh fruit works, too, but for some reason, it never cures the crave for me.

Motivation - have you heard of The Secret? If not, check out the book from your library. I'm using a positive mantra which I repeat constantly during the day. "I am losing two pounds a week." Keeping that reinforcement running through my head reminds me to eat only what I need and in appropriate portions. It also reminds me to be active. Walk up the stairs a couple extra times each day, walk to the neighbors instead of driving. Do leg lifts while I'm watching television. Turn on the radio and dance around the kitchen.

The positive reinforcement of this type of mantra solidifies my willpower and becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

And now to my favorite - reward. There's nothing I like more than to surf the web for a good deal, buy it, and enjoy the anticipation of a package heading my way via UPS. Every week that I achieve my goal of two pounds lost, I will buy something inexpensive. A new bead for my bracelet, a new face cream, and when the pounds are really dropping - along with my dress size - new clothes. I'm truly lookng forward to shopping as an instant reward for reaching the tiny goal of two pounds.

I've never tried the reward approach before, and I have a good feeling that celebrating tiny goals, instead of waiting to reward myself once I reach that final, huge goal, will bring me more success.

The other side of the reward prong is consolation. If I don't reach my goal of two pounds that week, I will not be shopping, and instead will choose a slip of paper from the To Do jar. On these slips, I've written chores that need to be done around the house. Big, ugly chores, like Clean Out Credenza, and Straighten Pantry. Clean Refrigerator, and Reorganize File Cabinet.

This will not only give me an extra dose of exercise toward reaching my goal that week, it will set up good habits for me as I feel the pride of a clean closet, or organized drawer... (I just rolled my eyes at that pride hoo-haw. Gosh, I hate cleaning!)

Support - I've just joined the Facebook page Romance Biggest Winner. Starting in February, this group of romance lovers will organize to support one another under the leadership of Helen Seely, a really great person who has more dedication and energy than anyone I know. Published authors and readers will be competing. Participation is not free, but spending a little money makes it motivational, as well.

To find out more, Like the FB page at https://www.facebook.com/pages/Romance-Biggest-winners-part-2/128300167287718, then check out the rules (these are last year's rules, and I'm told they're changing a bit this time - more to come soon!) http://romancebiggestwinner.blogspot.com/2011/06/romance-biggest-winner-competition-is.html

While this site is very supportive and motivational, it's also rewarding. The author and reader who lose the most weight will each receive $1,000 at the end of the event. And each week, the winning team gets free books!

I hope you'll join me on the Biggest Winner challenge, and if you're one of those lucky people who are hoping to lose weight this year, tell me how you're doing it. What is working for you?

Have a great day,
Laura
LauraBreck.com